And No, it was Nothing Like "Meet the Parents"
* First off, my apologies for this very late blog post. Between the holidays, getting insanely sick, going back to work, conventions, & lil Sean's Bday this month has been CRAZY. I hope to get back on track with 2 posts per month. Besides this is the ONE YEAR mark till my wedding!*
Many of my coworkers giggled at my expense, when I shared with them that I'd be meeting my "soon to be" family over the holiday break. Some regaled me with tales/nightmares of their own meetings with their in-laws, while some offered up advice. Most of the advice & stories I had heard were about meeting a significant other's parents, but lucky for me Sean's Mom & I already have a great relationship!
FACT: She began introducing me as her future daughter in-law when Sean & I LITERALLY 1st started dating - yeah my eyes popped outta my head & hit the floor when that 1st happened! LOL!
This post is actually about me meeting Sean's extended family over the holiday season. :) Even with all of the support, advice, etc I was still nervous that I was going to get this wonderfully judging look from the family.
Many of my coworkers giggled at my expense, when I shared with them that I'd be meeting my "soon to be" family over the holiday break. Some regaled me with tales/nightmares of their own meetings with their in-laws, while some offered up advice. Most of the advice & stories I had heard were about meeting a significant other's parents, but lucky for me Sean's Mom & I already have a great relationship!
FACT: She began introducing me as her future daughter in-law when Sean & I LITERALLY 1st started dating - yeah my eyes popped outta my head & hit the floor when that 1st happened! LOL!
This post is actually about me meeting Sean's extended family over the holiday season. :) Even with all of the support, advice, etc I was still nervous that I was going to get this wonderfully judging look from the family.
After hyperventilating in a quiet corner somewhere in my mind, I came to my senses and told myself, "Hey! They are going to love you!" Fortunately the event of meeting the in-laws/extended family was nothing like the movie "Meet the Parents." (If you haven't seen this movie YOU MUST!)
Instead it was all very exciting and positive! I got to meet a few of Sean's Aunts, Uncles, & Cousins over the Christmas holiday. I didn't get to spend a ton of time with all of them (as I had gotten pretty sick over the holidays), but I am happy to have met them all.
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Instead it was all very exciting and positive! I got to meet a few of Sean's Aunts, Uncles, & Cousins over the Christmas holiday. I didn't get to spend a ton of time with all of them (as I had gotten pretty sick over the holidays), but I am happy to have met them all.
Now, you may ask, how did you do it? How did you win them over & get over your fears?
I cooked. I laughed. I smiled.
Once I got over my ridiculous worries and fears, I settled back into reality and showed them who Lani is - in a nutshell.
As my parents always taught me, "1st impressions MATTER!" So I made sure that every time I met the family, I put on the ultimate piece of makeup - A SMILE.
FACT: Smiling helps to alleviate your stress and is contagious, making those around you smile too.
(I used to teach kids in Public Speaking this fact)
FACT: Smiling helps to alleviate your stress and is contagious, making those around you smile too.
Once I did the initial meet & greet with everyone it was time to plan for the Xmas dinner day. I decided to do what I do best, I cooked some of my fav dishes - a roast chicken (which I flavored with a ton of spices, so no recipe to share, just know that it was YUMMY), salmon lasagne (Sean & I once again semi followed a recipe...but in the end we created our own dish that unfortuantely can't truly be replicated), and - my holiday staple - a double layer pumpkin cheesecake.
And once again...my silly fears and imaginiation had taken flight...for NO REASON.
I was asked about "what I did," my background, and other non terrifying questions to help them learn more about me - the future addition to their family. Instead of getting interrogated, I got CONVERSATION. Oh the insanity!
Once the shock wore off that I was not going to be water boarded or hooked up to a lie detector (PLEASE watch "Meet the Parents") I dove right into the holiday festivities, I even got to play a round of UNO (which I won & after that the family members stopped playing...so...as far as I can tell I am "undefeated"... )! :D
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After this whole experience I came to an understanding. As much as we (significant others) are nervous about meeting the "soon to be" family, they too are a touch nervous. They only want their son, daughter, nephew, niece, grandson, granddaughter etc to be happy! And if you do just that, they are ecstatic!
It truly was wonderful to realize that my "soon to be" family would just be...my family. Or as "Lilo & Stitch" would say, Ohana. :)
Thank you to all of my "soon to be" family members for being fun, hysterical, & welcoming.
My advice on meeting the "soon to be" family: DO try to put your best foot forward, but DON'T hide who you are! Sometimes words aren't always enough, so let your "actions" share more about you - whether it's cooking, a geeky crafty gift, a sport, etc. Be immensely proud of yourself, so let that shine through your SMILE! Good luck!
Love,
Lani
